December 2010
5 posts
of course I care
and I’m sorry for talking to you on here rather than texting you back. But please. You can’t talk to me anymore. I’ve been begging you. If I’m ever going to get better I’ve got to stop regressing. Every time we talk all the progress I’ve made goes out the window. I haven’t made very much progress at all. I do care about you and about pep. of course I do. I...
I just have to say
we just talked. After all the screaming last night and everything that reminded me why we can’t work, I still love you. And I still want nothing more than for the both of us to get better so we can be together. But if one of us gets better and the other doesn’t it still won’t work. You are worth more than this. Hold yourself to the value you deserve. It breaks my heart to watch...
my therapist says
that no one is ready for a relationship until they are okay enough with themselves to be alone. Relationships don’t validate people, people validate themselves. Any relationship before this point of enlightenment is doomed from the getgo. It’s a quick fix. Life isn’t truly lived by chasing the next high. It’s lived by accepting your pain while you’re in it, and being...
every time that you contact me
it sets my healing back so far. Please. Please. If you love me like you say… Please under no circumstances short of you or someone in yor family dying should you contact me. We both have shit to work on. I think your victory over tms is great. But that was the least of our problems. I love you very much and I wish you the best. But I can’t have contact with you. You say were soulmates....
RODNEY.
i NEEEED space. please. If we’re ever going to be friends I need space. please. I’m begging you. I know this is hard and I hate it too. But leaving me texts telling me to “man up” isn’t helping anything. Anger isn’t helping anything. I accept that I love you and I accept what was beautiful about our relationship and I accept that you are beautiful. But I have to...
November 2010
7 posts
I'm so sorry.
I hate this.
shaking right now
why do you keep calling me after I begged you not to call me anymore? I told you maybe we can be friends one day in a long time after we have both healed. hearing your voice call me babe just sets me backward, and judging by how angry rather than sorry you felt by reading this (which I’m so sorry, I honestly didn’t think you’d read this I haven’t updated it in over a year,...
I was just thinking
about when I started crying while we fooled around that one time and I couldn’t stop. And how you walked out. You left me. It pissed you off that I was sad. You didn’t stay and hold me. You just left. Even though I asked you to stay. I cried for like an hour. Naked. Alone in your bed. And also. Howu yo bought me roses…twce. When you knew I hated them. I had told you on multiple...
It's weird
because I’m out doing things that should be fun. And I pretend like they’re fun. God I’m so good at faking it. Because they’re not fun. I do enjoy myself. Sometimes. But never without the pang of missing you. I can’t be fully happy without you. But you were the one who left in the first place and maybe we should both trust your instincts. maybe no matter what we do it...
and
if you ever cared I wouldn’t have had to ASK you to delete your facebook or any of those things. I know I made some big mistakes but I think a fine difference between you and I is that I took responsibility for mine and I made sure not to repeat them. I also felt so wracked with guilt the TWO times that I lied to you that I HAD to confess after awhile because I couldn’t keep it in. I...
also
you never even begged or pleaded like I did. You never said ‘please don’t go’. I begged when you left. You just accepted it. You didn’t fight. You didn’t care. I had a dream this afternoon that we were fooling around and you seemed distant like you so often did when we would do that. And I asked you why and you looked me in the eye and said ‘because I’m...
I hate this
since I can’t talk to you and I know you don’t check this I can get this out here. I miss you so much it hurts. Today at dinner someone talked about metro airport. I had to go to my bed and have a breadown. I can still feel you. Still smell you. I’m so angry for the things you’ve done. How you’ve hurt me and ruined our relationship beyond repair. I can’t be with...
April 2010
8 posts
January 2010
7 posts
December 2009
24 posts
A - Available: On paper. B - Best Friend: I have three. C - Crush: So complicated you don’t even know. D - Dad’s Name: Marvin. Haha. E - Easiest Person To Talk To: Probably @kittenwisker F - Favorite Band: Lydia G - Gummy Bears Or Worms: oh god i love gummy worms. the sour neon brite ones. H - Hometown: South Lyon, MI I - Instrument: Piano J - Job: Bussin’ K - Kids: wantttt. now. L -...
Adam Lambert
Thank you so much for proving to conservative America that they were right about gay people. You are just the perpetuation of the stereotype that has us down in the first place. I hate you.
jess
alixmastrucci:
i hate the goddamn beatles and hate seeing them everywhere i look.
i thought it was cool to like the beatles a few years ago not now.
i still cannot believe they made beatles into sims
and made them perform in musci videos
and these videos are on tv.
and people watch it.
like its okay
and normal.
I am crying so hard right now. This song has a... →
Hippopotamus
My life is not necessarily something I’m proud of, but I think it’s at least interesting. To say the least. Last Wednesday, I was at Target. And I mean, I’m a normal kid. I do normal kid shit, I hang with normal kids. But sometimes my life gets a little… not normal. I guess. Maybe I’m not normal. I don’t know. I love to ramble. I’m doing it now. I’m getting so off subject. Target. Is...
“The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so...”
– Bertrand Russell (via daveconn) (via serpentsbeneaththeirhoods)
captainkirk:
…HUH.
I WEAR SKINNY JEANS A LOT AND UHM. THEY DONT GO OVER MY SHOES AND N I AM NOT STUFFING THEM IN TO MY SHOE BECAUSE THAT LOOKS STUPID
…idk what to do
cuff them!
an open letter
I talked to you yesterday. You lied about returning a movie. I texted your mom. Turns out you lied about telling her what happened between us. Then you told me you told your stepdad. Turns out, you lied about telling him, too. Why do you keep lying? What is that going to help? I always find out. Always. You’re a terrible liar. Stop lying, or we’re never going to get past this. Tonight, I find...